Letting Go

As a parent, it’s my nature to hang on to my kids. When something threatens their safety, I pull them in. When I want to provide for their needs, I pull them in. When I want them to know how much I love them, I pull them in. These are all good—and necessary—but I need to get comfortable with letting them go. If Jenny and I fail to do this with wisdom from an early age, they will grow from sheltered boys into dependent men.

Teaching our oldest to ride a bike has been a small microcosm of this and has reminded me just how capable kids are. Within days of him stripping off his training wheels, he was going on 5-6 mile rides with me, and it was so satisfying to see him go and gain more and more control over his bike. But there were a few reluctant moments leading up this. He said he hated his bike when he crashed into a wall and smashed his groin into the handle bars. He walked his bike home after loosing control and falling into a ditch. He shed tears of pain after scraping his palms and knees from a turn that was too sharp. And, as his Dad, it was tough seeing him go through so much pain but I didn’t want him to give up. I remembered the joy and freedom my bike afforded me as a kid and I wanted that for him. So, I encouraged him. I made sure I didn’t pull him in out of fear that he would get hurt and encouraged him to push on. And that he did. I’m proud of you, son!